Rambles from the Waiting Room

(Thursday, May 9)
I am sitting in the cafeteria at St Joe's hospital, with earbuds, a piece of paper and a brand new pencil. Ken is in OR prep. There is a tv screen with each patient's number and it tells where they are in the process. Ken is number 4011. It's so incredibly brilliant. This would have been such a blessing when Micah had his surgeries. It would have taken some of the anxiety out of the process. I am thankful that this is available now. It's not a big deal in our situation today. But with longer more serious surgeries, it would be wonderful.  

Number 4727 has been in the OR for almost 4 hours. There is part of me that wants to go find that family and ask if they need something. Food. Drink. Hug. Encouragement. An ear. Anything. I know the 4rth, 5th, 6th and 7th hour of surgery very well. It's such a hard place to be.

Ken sat in a bed in pre-op for 3 hours. They were running quite behind. They should have let him keep his clothes so that we could go for a walk.  Hospital time = Hurry up and wait! (: As we sat, I listened to what was going on behind the other curtains. You can't help but hear. I would love to do the job that the nurses in pre-op do. I could handle vitals and instructions - They told almost everyone the same thing. I could probably even learn to wrangle an IV if I had to. If Ken was reading that last sentence, he would laugh and suggest that I not try IV's. He thinks that my fine motor skills are lacking. (:  I guess that I would love to be in a medical setting without doing the medical part. Talking to people before surgery and taking care of the family during and after the surgery makes my heart beat faster. The same would go for families with people, especially kids, in treatment. Sometimes people just need someone to walk with them. I could do that. But the position doesn't exist! Medical without the medical. If I was on my phone, I would have the perfect emoji for that last sentence!! haha.

I just saw Ken's status turn to, "in the OR". Progress is good. We are so excited about this nose surgery. He has gone from doc to doc FOR YEARS trying to figure out how to fix his constantly stuffed up nose. About 14 months ago, we were finally referred to the right guy. He discovered that Ken was hardly getting air through his nose because of the way it's formed. So he doesn't sleep well. He is always so tired. It makes it harder to be active as well. It has been miserable. It's obviously not life-threatening, but it's a quality of life issue.  He waited 14 months for a surgery date and it's finally here. It's a terrible time of year for a teacher to be away from school for 2 weeks, but we have to take what we can get and we are so thankful.

(I am now writing past tense because it's days later.)
While Ken was in the place where he was waking up, I was sitting with an older lady and an older man, who both waiting for their spouses. We chatted for at least an hour. I am realizing that I love making 'friends' in these kinds of situations. I enjoy talking to strangers. We talked about politics and about our health care system. The man has had open heart surgery and cancer. We talked about Micah's journey.  The lady was feisty and funny. Her husband of 57 years was having his rotator cuff fixed. I smiled at her and told her that they must have been beside us in pre-op. I knew a lot about his surgery. (: Her 74-year-old husband, who looks more like 60, still skis black diamond slopes and hikes in Arizona. Crazy town. Another older man came up to me and asked me to help him make a call on a cell phone he was obviously borrowing. It was like a little community.

The lady left us first. After she left, the man and I talked about his wife. She was just diagnosed with breast cancer. How painful. He was hoping that the margins were good on what they took out.  I asked him how he was doing. I asked him how his wife was taking this hard road. I saw so much pain in his eyes. They could have a long road ahead of them. I wish that I would have got his contact info. I would love to know how they are doing. Even though we made great friends for an hour, I know that not everybody is as open as I am. It often holds me back from asking for an email address. I could be perceived as a weirdo or as someone who cares. It's hard to know.

I realized on Thursday how long it has been since I walked hospital halls and looked into people's eyes as we passed each other, wondering what they were thinking and what life held for them after this surgery day. Was it an exciting feeling? Was their person having a reasonably simple surgery that they had been waiting for like us? Or was it dread? Were they wondering what was going to happen after this day was done? Will their lives change forever after this day? Thursday reminded me that hospitals are places that hold so much. Joy. Sorrow that follows a person through the rest of their lives. Relief. Fear. Thankfulness. Knowing that the Lord will go before us and is already there, no matter what our future holds, is so precious to me. I so long for every person to have that comfort.