Just thinking....
I have been thinking that last few days about the fact that God goes before us and knows exactly what we need and when we will need it. He often uses hard times to accomplish this.
This past week, when Micah went for an Xray, it was really hard on Ken and I. The thoughts of relapse are never far from our minds. After the kids had gone to bed that night, we were talking about the day. I told him that I felt a little bitter. I am tired of the bumpy ride and I just want the roads smooth. The up and down is so exhausting. He was thinking the same. We were thankful we had a clear picture of his lungs, but were not content with our circumstances. Wrong, I know!
Sometimes God shows us reasons why He does things. He may wait for years to reveal it or it may come sooner. There are also things we will never understand until we go to heaven. Well, He has already shown us two reasons why it was good for Micah to have an XRAY and for us to have a tough day!
1. Micah has a horrible cold. His chest is congested and he coughing a lot. They are not small coughs, but deep hard ones. They really remind me of his relapse cough. If we had to listen to that cough, not knowing what his lungs looked like, I know for certain, we would be paralyzed with fear.
2. We don't have to think about Micah's next scan, which is about 3 weeks away. The weeks coming up to a scan are hard weeks for us. We had it all pushed into one day. There was no anticipating or waiting. It is like Natalie going to the doc and not knowing she needed a needle until the moment before she gets it. Another example is telling Ken that he has a dentist appt the same day as the appt. Haha. The time of anxiety is quite short.
I just wanted to share that with you. It makes me thankful! (o:
As I write this, I have realized that if I would trust and put my belief of the fact that He is always faithful into practice more often, our road wouldn't be so bumpy. It would still hurt, but I wouldn't be so hard. It is easier said than done, but in His strength it can happen.
I also have to regularly remind myself that we are not entitled to a smooth road. We are not owed or do not deserve anything. Pastor John, you taught us a lot of things. But that one fact about being entitled has to be one of the most important things you taught me. It took me a long time to get it, but I have got it now! Thank you! (o:
I also have to keep better perspective. If you would have told me that in Sept 2011, we would still have Micah, I would not have believed you. It is crazy. I need to stop complaining about the small details and be thankful for the big the picture.
This past week, when Micah went for an Xray, it was really hard on Ken and I. The thoughts of relapse are never far from our minds. After the kids had gone to bed that night, we were talking about the day. I told him that I felt a little bitter. I am tired of the bumpy ride and I just want the roads smooth. The up and down is so exhausting. He was thinking the same. We were thankful we had a clear picture of his lungs, but were not content with our circumstances. Wrong, I know!
Sometimes God shows us reasons why He does things. He may wait for years to reveal it or it may come sooner. There are also things we will never understand until we go to heaven. Well, He has already shown us two reasons why it was good for Micah to have an XRAY and for us to have a tough day!
1. Micah has a horrible cold. His chest is congested and he coughing a lot. They are not small coughs, but deep hard ones. They really remind me of his relapse cough. If we had to listen to that cough, not knowing what his lungs looked like, I know for certain, we would be paralyzed with fear.
2. We don't have to think about Micah's next scan, which is about 3 weeks away. The weeks coming up to a scan are hard weeks for us. We had it all pushed into one day. There was no anticipating or waiting. It is like Natalie going to the doc and not knowing she needed a needle until the moment before she gets it. Another example is telling Ken that he has a dentist appt the same day as the appt. Haha. The time of anxiety is quite short.
I just wanted to share that with you. It makes me thankful! (o:
As I write this, I have realized that if I would trust and put my belief of the fact that He is always faithful into practice more often, our road wouldn't be so bumpy. It would still hurt, but I wouldn't be so hard. It is easier said than done, but in His strength it can happen.
I also have to regularly remind myself that we are not entitled to a smooth road. We are not owed or do not deserve anything. Pastor John, you taught us a lot of things. But that one fact about being entitled has to be one of the most important things you taught me. It took me a long time to get it, but I have got it now! Thank you! (o:
I also have to keep better perspective. If you would have told me that in Sept 2011, we would still have Micah, I would not have believed you. It is crazy. I need to stop complaining about the small details and be thankful for the big the picture.
Thank you Lord!
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