Trials

I have been thinking about the purpose of trials. God uses our trials to mold us, to change us, to teach us, to make us more dependent on Him and to draw us near to Him. Our family has been through many trials in the last few years and there is no doubt that God has taught us so much. We are very different in so many ways. We are in the process of being refined. It is a painful process, yet it is a blessing. We have had some beautiful times sitting at His feet. Really its indescribable. There are times when we have physically felt Him near. We hold those times dear and they will never be forgotten.

I have a sure knowledge that the path God has set out for us, whether its hard or easy, is best for us. But what I find a struggle is that we often have to lose something in the process. I think it would be easier to walk into the storm if we knew we would be in one piece when we walk out the other side. I want to emerge from this storm with our family fully intact. I want to grow and experience the beauty and the benefits of being refined. But my sinful heart wants things done my way. I want to put limits on what God will do. I want to tell Him I will only go so far. I want to tell Him that I am willing to walk through anything He wants me to. Just. Let. Us. Keep Our. Son. But it just doesn 't work that way! True submission says, "Thy will be done."

I have to remember that He has given us everyone that we love. Our children especially are a beautful gift and are on loan to us for as long as He thinks best. But we tend to hold on so tight to the things and people He has given to us and they are not even ours.


When life is easy and we are walking on the mountain, being a chrisitan and submitting to God sounds so neat and easy. But you know what? Down in the valley walking through the storm, it doesn't always sense. It's messy. It hurts. We are going to lose things that are so precious to us.


Life is messy and it does hurt, but I am so thankful that we have a God who will give us strength when we can't lift our head, and He will carry us until we are able to walk on our own again.