In Christ Alone our Hope is Found

We just had our first birthday of the year. I hope to write a post for each kid around their birthday. If I say it here, maybe it will happen. It gets a little dicey because we have 4 birthdays within 3 weeks in April. I will have to start now. (: They are all big ones this year - 6, 12, 16, 18, 20, 24. They are all such pretty, round numbers. I remember saying 10 years ago-  Can you imagine when our kids are these numbers? And now we are here! Josh's number isn't as signficant as the others, but it is my favourite number and it's his first year as a married man. How special is that!  This past Friday Micah turned 20. I think that every birthday is special. Another year of life given is always a gift. But there is gravity in this birthday for us- Us as in Ken and I. Since Micah was little when we walked the hard with him, he doesn't remember everything. Ken and I can see it as a story and I think that his view is different from ours. It's more bits and pieces. There...

I seem to be constantly writing posts about Tessa in my mind. The things she says and does often make me smile. She is sweet, soft and funny and a little bit of crazy and quirky all balled into one. Ken says that she is so like me and I love that. I regret not writing down the things she has said in the last while. Now that I'm here, I don't have the words.   The thing I love most about her is how much she loves me. Even if I leave for 10 minutes, she runs to me when I get home and hugs my leg and tells me how much she missed me and how much she loves me. She tells me multiple times a day that she loves me soooooooooooo much!!!!! Often when she tells me, she will kiss my leg.   The picture below was taken on a Saturday afternoon a few months ago. The sun was shining and it was chilly. We grabbed my pillow and a warm blanket, put some music on and had a nap on the trampoline. I woke up because she had one hand on my face and the other on my throat. haha. But it's beau...

I came across a quote on facebook this morning in my memories and it's one of my favourites. I was going to just share it again, but I started writing and it got too long and felt a bit too personal. By putting it in a post, you have to click into my life to read it and somehow that feels better to me.  Sometimes when we are hurt by people, it's harder to see God's sovereignty. All you can see are those people, the hurt and the wreckage that was left behind. It can leave you stuck, without perspective and holding a ball of yarn. All mixed up in the yarn is confusion, feelings of inadequacy, hurt, questions, disappointment (etc) AND the knowledge that God is always good and that His path is always the right one. It can be hard to reconcile those two sides. Sometimes it can take years for you to find the end of the string to start untangling. In the mean time, you can feel like you are just standing there frozen, holding your yarn while life goes on without you. But as much a...

November 27, 2020. We got a call from Micah at about 10pm telling us that the van he was in (not ours) was in the middle of the road and that they would need a tow truck. By our conversation, I got that the van broke down. The three younger kids were sleeping. Ken had just put some croquettes in the oven for a snack and we were just hanging out together. I took the car and Ken took the van, anticipating that Ken would wait with the boys for a tow truck and I would bring Natalie and her friend back to our house. Just after I turned onto Sunset, Micah called me and told me to not be upset when I got there because they had to call it in and there were emergency vehicles there. They were all ok. It's all ok. He was kind to warn me. But I actually wasn't prepared.  I drove down Sparta Line past the golf course, rounded a few bends, and stopped at the top of the hill. I had just driven through the darkness of the back roads and all of the sudden the darkness was filled with flashing ...

There is a trail called Top of the Giant in Thunder Bay and Ken is going to ‘Conquer the Giant’ with Micah and Josiah in July, Lord willing. This walk will be a fundraiser for pediatric cancer research. It’s a celebration and a way to give back. For those reading this who don’t know our story, here is the link that will give you a very short synopsis.  Ken has wanted to do this for many years and he had decided that he was going to do it the year that Micah was 10 years cancer free. We also wanted to have a giant bbq to wrap up the fundraiser, with all of the people from far and wide, who loved and supported us all of those years. But last year covid happened. Covid is still happening, so we can’t have our party, but Ken can still do his walk.    We feel so much gratitude first to God for all that He has done for us. But we also feel so thankful for the medical technology and research that Micah had access to. The treatment for cancer itself has come such a long way in t...

I was looking through my posts and realized that this one was never published. I don't want to forget Tessa at 4.This was originally written in August 2020. On Sunday nights Ken often goes for a drive, usually to Port Bruce. The people who go with him vary depending on the night. Last night, Tessa and I went along. Tessa loves being with Ken and I. She got in the van and said with a shrug of her shoulders, “Well, I guess it’s just the three of us.” It was a delighted shrug. Her face was kind of content like picture below when she said it.   When we got to the beach and I opened the door, the sound of the waves made my heart skip a beat. The wind was blowing in my face and the waves were roaring. They were so loud that Ken and I could hardly hear each other. Look at this spectacular wave. Tessa collected sticks and planted feathers. She chased seagulls and ran from waves. Tessa thinks about the future a lot and asks a lot of questions. As we were driving home from the beach, she to...

Most of the time I dump my pictures on Facebook. I love to see my memories come up every year. I went to do that yesterday, but I just couldn't do it. I like writing words with the pictures just like the good old days. I think looking back at my blog is better in the end. I need to start blogging our everyday life like I used to do when the kids were small. I find it enjoyable.                                                                  Anybody who knows me, knows that I love water. I love love love water. In mid-summer, we go 3 or 4 times a week after we do supper dishes. I don't love sitting on the beach in mid-day in the sun. I go to listen to the waves, walk with Ken and watch the sun go down. When I hear the wind blowing through our trees, I will often jump in the van and go. It's so beautiful. It shows the Lo...